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An Officer but No Gentleman(85)

By:M. Donice Byrd


“I’ve changed my mind. Is the offered to massage my leg still open? It really hurts like the devil.”

In truth, having her touch him was the second to last thing he wanted. Having her leave, was the last.

Charlie hesitated, but nodded. He released her then moved to the bed. After propping the pillows, he sat down. As Jaxon moved the robe to reveal his leg, he remembered he only had a towel on under his robe.

“Let me go put on my unmentionables. You caught me stepping out of the tub when you knocked.”

“Don’t bother on my account. It’s not as if I haven’t seen you naked before.”

Jaxon paused, but leaned back, pushing the towel between his legs to shield her view.

Charlie pressed the heels of her hands into his thigh and began her massage.”

“Jayne came to see me last night—actually she came to see you to work on wedding plans.”

Charlie momentarily paused in her ministrations. “Was she relieved that she wouldn’t have to be my maid of honor?” Her eyes met his for a moment.

“She’s so shy that’s what I would’ve thought, too. But she was mad and gave me quite a lecture.”

“She did?” A sad smile lifted Charlie’s lip momentarily.

“Aye, she thinks since it’s my second broken engagement, I’ve not only wrecked my only chance of ever marrying, but I’ve destroyed hers as well.”

“You know I don’t know enough about land rules to grasp why she would think so.”

“Because I’ve ruined your reputation by having you stay here with me and not marrying you. It reflects on my corrupt morals and, according to Jayne, if it’s true of one Bloodworthy, it must be true of us all.”

As her hands found a particularly sore spot, Jaxon winced and leaned his head back, closing his eyes.

“She called me a villain for ruining you and doesn’t think you grasp the implications of being a fallen woman.”

Had Jaxon been looking at her, he would have seen her swallow reflexively as she fought to keep the lump out of her throat.

“I probably don’t. But since I am not a land girl, my damaged reputation will stay here in Chimerical Cove. As I said, I do not see marriage in my future so no one will know my shame.”

He hated hearing her refer to their lovemaking as her shame. He grabbed her by the arms, bringing his face close to hers. “I’m sorry, but I cannot let you do this, Charlie. I will not let you go back to a life you hate. I have taken your innocence and I will live up to my obligation.”

Charlie rankled at the use of the word obligation. In a blink of an eye, she freed herself from his grasp and stood up. “I will not marry you, Jaxon.”

“Think about it, Charlie. If you marry me you can have your dresses. You won’t have to sack the men who were loyal to you. It will feel like firing your family.”

“They are not my family. Their loyalty shifts with the sea.”

I am alone.

“And apparently yours does as well.”

Charlie stood with her feet wide and her arms across her chest. “You will tell me what you mean by that.”

Jaxon flung his legs over the side of the bed and rose to his feet. “Your men killed for you and came after you and you will repay them by casting them out on their asses. Tell me, do you intend to at least keep Morty?”

“He doesn’t have the ability to keep a secret. He would forget himself and refer to me as she.”

“You would go aboard a ship with no one to protect you? What if you are found out? Do you think being the owner is armor against rape?”

“I will be safe as long as no one knows.”

“Charlie, you are a fool if you think you can keep your secret forever. You were on my ship for only a few hours when we found out. You are lucky we had no ill-intent.”

“What would you have me do?”

“Marry me.”

“You are the one who broke off our engagement. You said you don’t love me.”

Jaxon’s brow lowered. He couldn’t explain that he felt the same as he did, but he didn’t know if it was love.

“At this point, love should not even factor into it, Charlie,” Jaxon said trying to be calm and reasonable. “If your father were alive, he would insist upon it.”

“I have my ship to think of.” Charlie grasped at any excuse. She knew the ship didn’t need her further than hiring a captain, but she could not face the reality of admitting he had no love for her and marriage with only her loving him was as wretched a prison as the living as a man.

“People all over the world own ships that they hire captains to sail,” he said. “You will be no different.”